Internalized Gaslighting
Internalized gaslighting is essentially when we’ve been gaslit so much (by the world, our community, rape culture, an abuser) that our mindset has shifted, and we begin doing it to ourselves. Our automatic thoughts end up being ones that question our sanity or sense of reality. Gaslighting is a transactional process in a relationship where, by means of psychological manipulation, someone is deliberately and consciously trying to make another person question their sense of reality or their sanity. This tactic is something we commonly see in abusive relationships, and it is considered to be a method of psychological abuse.
Nurturing Trauma Through Community
Connecting to the community can not only help us recover but help us thrive and work to change our culture as a whole into a space where rape and rape culture no longer exists. My incredible guest today is Olivia Pepper. They are a star poet, a practicing mystic and ritualist, a community organizer, and a fellow survivor. It is my personal suspicion that they are also secretly a super-gifted healer for our community. Part of what makes this so beautiful is how this is what it feels like it’s supposed to be. We’re supposed to have community surround us, but there’s a shame that survivors have internalized. Survivors are seen as burdens, and we carry this shame of being othered by society. This idea that we’re not supposed to bother people and intrude on anyone’s lives plagues us. To hear that nature intended for us to be centered and have love, community, and care wrapped around us is inspiring. Being in the center feels almost like we’re the most valued rather than the ones cast out. Instead of saying, “You’re ruining this for the rest of us. We’re going to let you go,” we say, “You’re so important. Let’s layer community members around you to keep you safe and well.”
10 Assumptions About Survivors
These are assumptions (or beliefs) that we should make an active choice to ascribe to as a way of interacting with survivors that’s actually helpful and effective and truly sees survivorship for what it is. Understanding that survivorship is a very unique experience and the transactions that survivors have with the outside world significantly influence their recovery is crucial. When the environment can hold beliefs about survivors that are more accurate, effective, and true to their experience, we can be more effective at helping survivors, dismantling rape culture, and ending sexual violence altogether.
I Believe Survivors
This is one of the more notable core values that I hold as a survivor and someone who works with other survivors. It is one of the first podcast episodes I published back in 2021 that I still believe to be an important topic of discussion. This is why I believe all survivors.
